I found these at a certain store here in Stamford that will remain unnamed, but if you look around the old block, Buster, I'm sure you'll find it. Then you can take care of all your holiday shopping with these oddly-translated products. The kids love 'em! Even if they have no idea what they are.
First up, is it a truck? No, it's a Toys King! Or maybe it's a car, as the decal on the hood says, right under a record-spinning grunting face. Um...what? You can usually judge these toys by how many periods they put at the end of a sentence, so you know this is a good one...........
Life can be stressful in the city. There's a lot of pressure. Once in a while you need to feel some power & steady freedom on a blue double-decker bus.
Now trending: #StyleCityCulture
If you're still unsure about this bad boy, just remember that the car headlamp is bring while go forward. Sold.
This next car is so awesome it's endorsed by Perkins! Yes, everyone's favorite place to stop on the interstate, hit the bathroom, and eat some soggy pancakes put their stamp of approval on a car so wonderful 100% and the best design new thing.
Heck, this car is so superioir powered that it even mitzte the sound of horses!
Maybe your son or daughter wants something a little more realistic. Well, it doesn't get more realistic than an emulational car, does it?
Perhaps Emulational Car is a little too high-octane for your kids. If that's the case, you can get them Top Grade Dance Racing! Does it dance? Heck yeah it does! Come on, it says "dance" three times on the front of the box!
What goes better with a dancing truck than Jazz Drum Rock Instruments?
Your kid can put on their own cool open dream concert with some tide music fashion by you and new music touch function!
Your little drummer's band will need someone jamming on a Guitar Excellent! All new items , it cannot be missed!
Is your little prodigy more into Rachmaninoff than rocking out? Then they'll surely love a musical instrument piano.
Over in the girls' section you'll find this totally legitimate and not at all bootleg Princess Kitchen!
I can't figure out this next box at all. The Engrish on here is just complete nonsense! It's like they made up their own silly language.
Well, at least Jenifer approves.
Enough girlie stuff - let's see what they've got for the boys. Oh heck yeah, it's Super Ninja, the Ninja Turtles' beefy cousins!
What do boys like more than roided-up turtles? Robots!
Especially ones with glary light and sound effect! Wait, just the one? I guess Falcon makes up for it with his Super Heighten power and finger that can curve.
Here's a game the whole family can enjoy. It's Happy Stitching! Who's This?
Wait - if it's a self-correcting puzzle, do you even have to do anything?
Finally, a little something for the moms. After a long day of shopping for your family, treat yourself to this fine item.
Remember the meaning of the holiday season: Month is ch! Where yerymaryer to all, and to all a good night!